Learning to Breathe

Why is it that the simplest things in life are often the most difficult to incorporate into our daily schedules? We have lengthy lists of things that we hope to accomplish each day, and tend to feel guilty if we cannot check off every item, often leaving us feeling inadequate. While striving to get to a place where we can relax and enjoy all of the things that we have accomplished, we miss the importance of taking a moment to “simply breathe.”

We take breathing for granted, as it is a vital function we must have to stay alive. By doing this, we miss the powerful act of sitting back and taking a deep breath when we are surrounded by obstacles that we encounter daily. The most important lesson I have learned this past year is to take a deep breath before reacting and to trust my intuition to guide me before responding to any situation.

Most of my life has been dedicated to achieving success in my personal and professional life. I was that type A individual who got to the office early, made a list of tasks to accomplish, and felt guilty if I missed anything. I walked a tightrope while trying to balance family and career, leaving me to feel inadequate in both. My physical and mental health suffered from my actions, and I believed that everything would be rectified once I retired. What a rude awakening I had when I realized that this was not to be the case.

I viewed retirement as an opportunity to explore my interests in writing and gardening, and found opportunities to advance my knowledge and practice of both. My passion quickly turned into a full-time job for each one, and I began to feel overwhelmed as I strived to reach my high standards of achievement. Old habits die hard, and I still had not learned the lesson of “taking a moment to breathe.”

One holiday season, I found myself in an emergency room suffering from a panic attack. My heart rate accelerated, and my mind was fearful of what was to come. My anxiety over getting everything done on my checklist and making everyone happy had finally overwhelmed me, and I vowed to do better in the future. Of course, the best-made plans often fall through, and such was my plight.

During the past year, I have suffered from several health problems caused by my improper handling of stress. I had no idea how much havoc that stress causes in our bodies, or how many physical and mental health problems can be improved by learning to breathe properly. Taking a moment for a deep breath before responding to daily challenges has reduced my stress level over time, significantly improving my physical health. Now, when I face a stressful situation, I simply take a deep breath before responding. This brings me back to the present, where I consider options rather than panic in situations out of my control.

This year, I will be fully present for the special moments of the holiday season and take time to stop and breathe when I feel overwhelmed with festivities. I permit myself not to respond to every party invitation with yes. I will pick and choose the ones that I attend and not feel guilty because I wanted to do something else. I won’t stress over holiday meals, trying to duplicate recipes from glossy magazines. Instead, I will appreciate the time spent with family and friends. I will bake cookies because I enjoy it, not because I must take them to an event. Most of all, I will remind myself that I am not a character in a Hallmark movie with the perfectly decorated house and homemade cookies or gingerbread houses that look like they came from a bakery. I will refrain from reaching for my cell phone to capture photos that will later be posted on Facebook and forgotten. Instead, I will be fully present in each moment, because that is all that I can control.

Finally, I will give myself and those around me gifts of peace and gratitude as we celebrate the season. When things do not work out as planned, I will take a deep breath and realize that life, like the season, can be unpredictable. Happy Holidays to all!